we have one life. one. we get to live this life here once. once.
it would seem prudent to live it united in peace, united about preserving equality and opportunity in the world, united with mindfulness about our environment, about wellness, about virtue.
it would not seem in our best interest to be divided, to be cruel or vicious, to inflict inequalities upon others, to be careless about our earth, to live ugly.
i’m struck – day after day these days – by how ugly ugly can get. there is no bottom bar. instead there is the deepest of evil crevasses from which people mine the power they desire, the control they feed upon, the extreme ugly they intend.
i have lost sleep over this – night after night. i have ranted and i have been horrified. i have wept and i have felt scared.
but I continue to have hope.
hope that there are more and more people – out there – who wish to live in gratitude, who wish to be caring, who lead with kindness, with generosity, who wish to move forward, to keep evolving, who are united by nature, whose nature it is to celebrate being united, who don’t choose to live ugly.
it was in full support of intentional redundancy that i jotted this down as soon as nathan on alone season 6 said it, “the only currency we have is gratitude.”
it was without hesitation i looked up belleruth naperstek’s prayer for healing, “just give me this … so i can start over, fresh and clean, like sweet sheets billowing in the summer sun, my heart pierced with gratitude.”
it is with humility I find myself starting another new day – just after the fall solstice – with a clear etch-a-sketch, a blank notebook ready to be filled. there is but one breath between here and not here and it would seem prudent that i have wholehearted gratefulness for that breath.
so it is without any self-editorial skirmish that i write – once again – about gratitude.
it really is kind of about breathing those breaths, about waking up, about the turn of seasons. it really is about appreciating another inhale-exhale – this chance to be alive and how we choose to embrace it.
in these times, the distinction of starting over on another day is clear. the clothesline waits for the kind of prayers we hang on it. there is a vastness between billowing sweet sheets – fresh, clean, hopeful, and limp skanky soilage – deflating, stale, regressive.
we all have choices. we may uphold the efforts of those who forward goodness, who pursue equality, who speak emphatically about the care and concern of all.
or we may uphold the efforts of those who forward vitriol and egoistic agenda, who pursue limits on people based on bigoted skews, who spew vile exclusion.
life just seems way too short to live ugly.
i am personally choosing being on the clothesline in the waning summer sun. billowing and breathing and giving thanks.
“…so keep your heart open – cause love will find a way…”
(love will find a way – pablo cruise)
these are hard times. we are all – undoubtedly – struggling to keep our hearts open. we are all – undoubtedly – trying to believe that love will find a way. somehow. some way.
“…and when you feel afraid, love one another
when you’ve lost your way, love one another
when you’re all alone, love one another
when you’re far from home, love one another
when you’re down and out, love one another
all your hope’s run out, love one another
when you need a friend, love one another
when you’re near the end, love
we got to love, we got to love one another…”
(love is the answer – john wilcox, kasim sulton, roger powell, todd rundgren songwriters – england dan & john ford coley recording)
these are hard times. we are all – undoubtedly – struggling to keep our hearts open. we are all – undoubtedly – trying to believe that love will find a way. somehow. some way.
“…when you’re down and out, there seems no hope at all
but if you just believe there’s no way we can fall
well, let us realize
that a change can only come
when we stand together as one…
…and the truth, you know, love is all we need…”
(we are the world – lionel richie/michael jackson)
these are hard times. we are all – undoubtedly – struggling to keep our hearts open. we are all – undoubtedly – trying to believe that love will find a way. somehow. some way.
“have enough courage to trust love one more time and always one more time.”
(maya angelou)
these are hard times. we are all – undoubtedly – struggling to keep our hearts open. we are all – undoubtedly – trying to believe that love will find a way. somehow. some way.
“i have decided to stick with love, for i know that love is ultimately the only answer to humankind’s problems. and i’m going to talk about it everywhere i go. i know it isn’t popular to talk about it in some circles today. and i’m not talking about emotional bosh when i talk about love; i’m talking about a strong, demanding love. for i have seen too much hate. […] and i say to myself that hate is too great a burden to bear. i have decided to love.”
(where do we go from here? – martin luther king, jr)
hard times. somehow. some way.
“…so keep your heart open – cause love will find a way…”
it would seem the most basic tenet – of any philosophy of life, any religion or belief system, any ideology, any world outlook, any life stance or doctrine of living.
it would seem that at the very root of all of it – this thing we do on this earth – being good people would be most important. we are – time and again – witnesses to and recipients of abundant goodness. likewise – time and again – we are capable of bestowing goodness.
but i suppose the word “good” is up for grabs these days. and i suppose each of us will define that – and what it means to be a good person – for ourselves.
as this election cycle continues to unfold until it screeches to a stop on november 5, we have some things to decide. we need to really discern what is actually happening, what candidates are really saying, what future plans they might enact, what adjectives describe them, their candidacy, their intention as president. we need be clear on what their overarching belief is of how the populace of this nation should be treated – which includes women and men, humans of all races, regardless of age, religion, gender identification, sexual orientation, economic status.
we need to be wary and aware, to check our sources, ask questions, have conversations in our communities and – even more importantly – beyond our own communities.
we need to hear the truths and pick apart the untruths, look for the kind of future we wish for, the people we aspire to look up to, the kind of country we will be able to count on for our future and the future of the other people in our homes, in our towns, our states, our nation.
for this country to move forward – to responsibly and continually evolve – is to give all equal access to vital physical needs, safety, education, health and healthcare, possibility. are we our brother’s/sister’s keeper or are we all about our individual selves – every person for himself – with no integration or inclusion of any others? what are the messages we wish this country to send to all the world?
it is my hope that our intentions as a country are ever more humanitarian, ever more generous, ever more open, ever more caring.
it is my hope that the ugly, mean-spirited, incoherent ramblings of a power-seeker are made plain to all in time for us to vote against it.
it is my hope that all people have the courage to step away from the zeal and status created by anger-mongering and popularity bandwagons to vote with true heart.
it is my hope that the gaslighting and conspiracy stories, the exaggerations, vitriol and lies, the sneakiness, the violent threats, vulgar rhetoric and promises of retribution, the misogyny, bigotry and the darkness of the shadow of authoritarianism are cast aside – for democracy, altruism, kindness, empathy, virtuous truths – for good people.
she said it and i immediately wrote it down. “american women are not stupid,” katty kay (bbc news correspondent) repeated elizabeth warren’s plainspoken words and then added that it should be the new slogan of the harris/walz presidential campaign. i wholeheartedly agree.
she’s absolutely right. american women AREN’T stupid. WOMEN aren’t stupid.
last wednesday the maga presidential candidate amplified a meme featuring two outstanding and accomplished women – hillary clinton and kamala harris. the comment about these two women – on this meme he deliberately shared – was the epitome of crass, vulgar beyond belief. i will not repeat it here. but something in me snapped.
even beyond the access-hollywood hot mic audio recording. even beyond his unending lewd, derogatory, demeaning comments about women. even beyond all the accusations of sexual abuse. even after a jury of his peers found him – this presidential candidate – guilty of sexual assault. even beyond every single other indictment, every single other conviction, every single other thing that disregards the rule of law. this scunge of a man is actually running for president – a position we wish our communities, our nation, our world, our children to hold in esteem – and it is unconscionable.
i have had zero respect for this maga candidate for some time now. his repugnant behavior has not resonated with me, amused me, entertained me or aligned with me one bit. his mean-spiritedness, his narcissistic self-devotion, his quest for autocratic power, his inability to play by the rules. this is a man who objectifies women, a man who sexualizes them, who aggressively degrades them, who sloughs them off, who takes advantage of them, who wants to control them, who sexually abuses them. and now i am sick to death of him. it is beyond the pale that he should even be able to run for the highest office of this land – he lacks any regard for anyone other than himself.
i am a woman. i am a daughter, a mother, a wife, a sister, a girlfriend. i am an aunt, a godmother, a female, a victim of sexual abuse. i am appalled.
women are not stupid. we will not vote for patriarchy, for the annihilation of the rights of women, for wearing skirts for men. it disgusts me to the point of nausea thinking of any woman – ANY woman – casting a precious vote for a man whose wishes are to put women back into their place and to control their bodies, to eliminate the rights of LGBTQ, to trash any racial, gender, religious, socioeconomic equalities we have achieved, to rule with an iron fist.
there is a woman around the block who has a sign that touts “women for [this candidate]“. i wonder every time i see it how it is possible that she supports this misogynistic bigot for president. what – on this good earth – is she thinking?
and so, though i am utterly distressed that any decent human being would support this maga candidacy, i want to specifically ask the women who are waiting to crown maga as leadership a few questions:
is there anyone in your family who is female, besides you? do you want them – as they live their life – to have freedom of opportunity, of decisions that will impact them, their bodies? do you care about their safety? do you care about their futures or do you wish to limit and imperil them?
is there anyone in your family who is LGBTQ? do you care about their rights, about their opportunity for the freedoms you have enjoyed, about their futures? do you care about their safety? do you care about them at all or do you wish to limit and imperil them?
is there anyone in your family who is not white? do you care about the equality that should be bestowed upon them, just like you? do you care about their safety, their futures or do you wish to limit and imperil them?
is there anyone in your family who is a child? do you care about their schooling, about their chance to learn the truth of history, about their free questions and research, about their safety, about their futures or do you wish to limit and imperil them?
is there anyone in your family who does not deserve proper healthcare – whether it is while they are younger or during their senior years? do you care about the social programs of social security and medicare continuing – with the freedom of choice – supporting them in their aging? do you care about their futures or do you wish to limit and imperil them?
is there anyone in your family who you would prevent from seeing the things that this maga candidate is saying, the things this maga candidate has said, the things this maga candidate has done, the crimes this maga candidate has committed, the extreme prejudices and contempt this maga candidate has for others? or are you hoping to emulate these behaviors, hoping that your dear ones emulate this, grow up to be this?
do you actually find this maga choice – unbelievably the person in all the country – this entire nation – that has been lifted up by the maga party as the best of the best – to be acceptable? how is that possible? what is inside your heart that makes this your ideal choice for leadership?
isn’t there reason to believe – a constitutional expectation – that the position of president of the united states of america should be held in the highest esteem, should answer to the highest of powers, should be a person of unparalleled virtue, should not limit or imperil the populace?
time to speak up. time to own what you have pondered, researched, debated, lost sleep over. time to honestly consider the choice and its true ramifications. time to think beyond yourself and reflect upon the legacy you are choosing. time to weigh in on the qualifications, the integrity, the character of the candidates. time to deliberate good and evil. time.
we have not remained silent. we have spoken and written and cartooned. we will continue to do so. because it is – indeed – time to take action.
our precious votes will not be squandered on a candidate whose sole focus is himself. they will not be spent on a man who lacks basic humanness, whose criminal and monstrous behaviors demonstrate his ambitions. they will not support a party that has eaten itself alive, that has become pistol-focused on autocracy, on mean-spiritedness, that would have the audacity to use name-calling and underhanded bitter tirades to represent itself. they will not be cast for a ticket that quashes the freedom of women and LGBTQ, that deliberately builds up the rich and ignores those in need, that slashes equality for race, gender, religion, orientation, that has intentional plans for undermining the life, liberty and pursuit of happiness of all in this country, all entering this country. these precious and important votes of ours will not buy into the repugnance of maga and its hideous scheme for the future. no.
instead, our votes – this opportunity, this responsibility, to participate in the future of the united states of america – will be cast with the honor and respect and diligence due them. they will be educated, considered, based on researched fact, leaning into joy and hope for future generations, looking toward light instead of bleak darkness.
there is no choice here. there is only one worthy candidate.
and though i would – with absolute certainty in my mind and heart – vote AGAINST maga, i, instead, will vote FOR the democratic ticket. i will vote FOR kamala harris and tim walz . i will vote for kindness and the community of this country. i will vote for democracy.
and i will take action each day to help the future of this country for us, for our daughter and son and their partners, for our friends and extended family regardless of their votes, for our town, our state, this nation and the world.
the choice is obvious. i am not going back to the stifling, suffocating, unconscionable ugliness of what we have seen – what we see – from maga.
three words stand out: weathered beauty. revered. a sign in the japanese garden section of the chicago botanic garden.
we walked around the 500 or so booths of the outdoor antique show held at the neighboring county fairgrounds. and we were drawn to the same kind of items, again and again. we are pretty consistent. we list to the things that are weathered.
it’s the tall peeling column we’d place in our living room somewhere near the peeling paint chunk of concrete that holds our iPod. it’s the galvanized metal work light on a tripod that would serve for reading in our sitting room somewhere near the old farm table, bits of barnwood showing through its white paint. it’s the old white porcelain coffee pot that would sit with the metal coffee pots on the shelf in our kitchen holding teabags. it’s the collection of glass doorknobs like every doorknob in our own home. we hold these things in esteem not because they are perfect, but because of their stories, because they are weathered, because they have patina, because they are real.
“you become. it takes a long time. that’s why it doesn’t happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in your joints and very shabby. but these things don’t matter at all, because once you are Real you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.” (the velveteen rabbit – margery williams)
in these times, it would seem that Real would count most, regardless of age or stage or any other categorizing of any sort at all. it would seem – in particular – that it be most important that we choose people around us who have become Real, who are Real. it would seem obvious – absolutely and entirely obvious – that is where truth is found, where respect is valued, where perspective is honed, where conversation is possible, where progress has potential.
we need be mindful of what we revere, of whom we revere, for there is much pretending, much misinformation and misrepresentation, much that is truly Ugly in this world. Real is sometimes difficult to discern and aligning with Real can make one vulnerable to the scorn of others.
but Real is, well, real.
“once you are Real you can’t become unreal again. it lasts for always.”
in so many ways – from up-close-and-personal to nationwide – this is a post of the moment.
“you are magic and not everyone can handle magic. some people are accustomed to mediocre. they run from magic. let them run…” (unknown)
people who have immersed themselves in mediocrity, who are threatened by anything bright with joy, who are afraid to step outside dark dullsville, who cling to their own agendas for power…these people will run from magic. and – i now agree – let them.
for you are not going to change someone’s mind who is a mediocrity-mongrel. he or she will clutch their good-enough expectations and will relish lack of abundant growth – for that is safer for them. they will purport to be interested in ‘the community ‘ – whether that be this nation or a closer-in community – and they will ultimately suffocate it.
magic is out there. it is people giving their all in service to each other. it is gorgeous and limitless. it is a gift. it – in the way that fireworks light up the sky – lights up other people, sparking pilot lights everywhere, spreading excitement in concentric circles wider and wider.
magic is the exhale of joy. it is the call and response of people – dedicated to one another and to thriving.
so in answer to this devotedness to less-than, this rejection of light, this dogged constancy in drudgery, in ugly, this resolve to quash the flourishing of all… i’d just say this:
let them run, those who can’t handle magic, those accustomed to mediocre. let them excise you in their zeal for the mundane. it is likely you will not miss them.
this time is fraught. there is not a lot of love going around. visit social media and you’ll see some pretty horrifically mean stuff. it never fails to surprise me what some folks are saying. like, wow….really?
in some ways it feels as if THINKING has stopped and REACTING has stepped in full force. under the guise of political prowess, it appears anything goes, yet, i wonder how many people are really stopping to think about the if-this-then-that of their staunch stances. dire ramifications are being ignored in deference to bandwagon chaotic rhetoric, mean-spirited pokes, two-sided mouth-talkers, atrocious meannesses. unimaginable backsliding cruelty fait-accompli project 2025/agenda 47 lays in wait, smugly enjoying the poverty of scutiny, the lack of reasoning. it’s sort of like everyone needs to go to time-out and THINK. critical thought is consequential. it is imperative. this IS an inflection point.
because – truly – this democracy is on the line. it is no longer ambiguous. it is no longer questionable. it is non-negotiable. it’s time to decide – where do we go from here? what do we really want for those who come behind us? what kind of country will this be? what kind of people will we be? who are we? who are you?
so, not too long ago, we took our penzey’s flag and hung it up on a spare old door we have sitting in the garden against the garage out in the backyard.
because “choose love” deserves to be flying (or, in this case, at least hanging.)
a reminder in a time – it appears – we all need reminders: are you choosing love? really?
if you need another reminder, watch lady gaga singing at baku 2015 european games opening ceremony. and imagine. imagine that here.
choose love. always.
*****
*thank you to bill penzey who steadfastly and bravely supports choosing love at all times.
crown (noun): a circular ornamental headdress worn by a monarch as a symbol of authority
and in this country, not one among us – no one – has any right to a crown. that’s what democracy is – we the people for the people – no monarch, no one above the law.
until now.
when suddenly, the supreme court has crowned the presidency – granted immunity to the position of president of the united states by declaring that presidents cannot be held criminally liable for laws broken as part of their official duties – incentivizing the unconscionable.
and suddenly, it’s no longer about democracy – where the rule of law applies to every person…every single person.
the last weeks have been mind-bogglingly distressing.
and where do we go from here?
we – the people – have some big decisions to make.
but the biggest one – the biggest decision – is simple:
america-the-democracy or maga-america.
it really boils down to: THIS AMERICA or THAT.
because the voting in of THAT would mean that THIS – this united states of america – would never look the same and THAT – the voting in of THAT – would be one of those profoundly devastating moments in history you look back upon where you can see that every single thing changed.
and we will – regrettably – be able to point to before and after. it will be unbelievably simple to plot the map that got us there.
for there is a very detailed plan for the demise of our democracy. it’s not secret. it is in plain view and every single person – who cares – has access to it. step by step it will strip away freedoms, respect for human rights and government by the people for the people.
we are in jeopardy.
THIS democracy is in jeopardy.
the crown is coming if we do not pay attention, if we do not raise awareness, if we do not talk about this, if we do not vote against it.
crowns do not belong here. except perched on the heads of little children blowing out birthday candles, young women celebrating quinceanera, drag queens or people at burger king.
reverse threading 