reverse threading

the path back is the path forward

Tag Archives: when to go and when to stop


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red-light-green-light-one-two-three. [kerri’s blog on not-so-flawed wednesday]

red-light-green-light-one-two-three!

we had long front yards in our growing-up neighborhood. it was noisy with the sound of children’s voices playing outside, especially around dusk. red-light-green-light, red rover, spud, mother-may-i….all those vintage outdoor games! it’s many-many seasons ago but somehow i can still feel the rush of those games.

i lived next door to a family of athletes. there were eight children and every one of them had amazing gymnastic or athletic ability. me? not so much. so any game or competition that involved athleticism – kickball, kick the can, climbing trees, running – i was never the surefire winner, but that never really mattered. it was simply all about the play. 

so, the thing about red-light-green-light is that you have to know when to move and when to stop. the person who is “it” turns around, facing the other direction. the rest of the players line up horizontally. as “it” recites “red-light-green-light-one-two-three” everyone who is not “it” starts to run forward, always aware that you must stop suddenly at the end and you must be absolutely still – no matter your stance. as soon as “it” finishes the word “three” they turn back and if they catch anyone moving at all, that person is out. the first person to get to “it” safely is the winner. ”it” can vary the speed at which they recite the words – going in slow motion or super-fast like the fedex guy on the commercials. you just have to be aware of when to gooo and when to stop.

sounds like life. you have to be aware of when to gooo and when to stop. the trick is being able to discern the thin thread between too soon and too late. on both ends.

in the way of synchronicity, sometimes these are obvious. in the best of times, things just sort of drop in and line up. in the most – well – challenging of times, it all feels like a battle. you are forcing things to start and then you are reluctant to stop, reticent to give it up. and there’s no one standing in front of you reciting red-light-green-light so you’re on your own.

but there are those moments in life – those moments of intuition – when you just know. things seem to align and you know it’s time to move. it has arrived – whatever it is that you have waited for, thought would never happen, couldn’t imagine in a million years, have attempted to conjure up to no avail. suddenly, you know that it’s time to run forward – fullsteamahead – full tilt. 

no matter what it is – any initiative you are undertaking, any practice you are trying to make habit, any new learning, any unraveling, any new exploration – of any sort – you give it the best you can. 

i guess going is kind of more important than stopping. i mean, who has time for stopping?

because just like when you were a child and red-light-green-light was a rush of adrenaline, so it is now. 

*****

read DAVID’S thoughts this NOT-SO-FLAWED WEDNESDAY

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those wander women. [saturday morning smack-dab.]

i hearted the comment by one of their instagram followers. it read: “boss move. inspire when you go. inspire when you stop. along for the ride whatever’s next.” exactly our sentiments.

the wander women HAVE inspired us. they have entertained us, taken us along on their adventures, encouraged us to plan, made us dream. we have watched them thru-hike the appalachian trail, the continental divide trail, the pacific crest trail – the triple crown. we have seen them in their rv, bemoaning the ailments that aging graces us with, yet, embracing those ailments, researching, asking questions, dealing with the cycles of grief that accompany those kinds of changes and, mostly, doing something about them. they self-care through the trappings of difficulties; they are solution-oriented and flexible. they are thriving.

their latest undertaking is to ride across-country on surly bikes – rail-trailing – from “sea to shining sea”. they rode from the pacific ocean through the state of washington, into idaho and entered montana. things got sketchy in montana – this country is not yet equipped to ride straight-across – and they were riding on shoulderless roads next to semis going 70 and 80mph, gravel or wobbles threatening their every pedal.

we are proud of their decision to stop. 700 miles in and they have decided to find a new plan, they have decided their safety and the enjoyment of each day is more important than just keeping on in a precarious situation.

and yes….it’s a boss move.

the wander women’s fortitude and courage and open-armed seize of life and experiences have made us realize that, though we have not thru-hiked before, we can set it as an intention. we can picture ourselves outside, weeks, months at a time, reveling in nature and quiet and every step. we can see the toe guards and the snack bags and the ponchos and the headnets. we wonder how we might arrange amazon-drone-drops of wine every so often.

though we watch many trailhikers, many backpackers and, as you know, have a certain affinity for, among others, that elusive my-own-frontier joey, it is the wander women – kristy and annette and, on earlier journeys, lynn, who inspire us, people of the same ‘certain’ age. they made a plan and set goals – retired, sold off their homes, their stuff, paid off their remaining debt, bought an rv and have a somewhat itinerant life full of fabulous escapades.

our plan will not likely mimic theirs, but who knows. the important thing is that it is making us excited about planning, excited about deliberate movement in that direction. those amazing wander women have been active hikers together all along, for decades. they have paid attention to their growth, their middle-age-changing-bodies; they have been mindful about their self-care and their continued movement. they “get outside”. but, they had to start somewhere. our hats are off to them – kristy and annette.

i figure – if they can do it, we can do it.

*****

read DAVID’S thoughts this SATURDAY MORNING

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