scrolling through IG i came across a post with a series of memes – positive words we’ve all heard before, but all succinctly placed as text boxes in appealing photographs that tug at our attention. words like: “be grateful that you slipped through the hands of people who had no f-ing idea how to hold you.” and “i hope you heal from things that nobody apologized for.”
there were more – i took a couple screenshots but then just became lost in this slew of (some really touching) reminders – things we all need to hear from time to time, things that – in the right moment – have the power to make us stop and think, lessen any ever-present pain, stop any perseverating we might be doing that might be harming us or taking away precious time of which we have not-enough.
it was the music that did me in. judah earl’s sand drawing was playing as the soundtrack music for these thoughtful emotion-elicitors. it was all at once striking and familiar. atmospheric and haunting, it reminded me of arvo part’s spiegel im spiegel with a soaring cello line and supportive simple piano. omg. just gorgeous.
the other day we passed by a couple who in the past have deeply hurt us. though they had posed as good friends back then, they were involved in some serious backstabbing behavior, sheer hypocrisy to their stated belief system, the antithesis of what they (piously) claim to be. it pains me to think about it. as we passed, the female of the couple cheerfully said, “hi guys,” as if nothing had ever transpired, as if they had never been betraying to the bonds of friendship of which they had pretended to have.
it was a gut punch for me.
i completely ignored them as they passed within a foot or so on the sidewalk. it was strange to be in such close proximity to someone who had never apologized for their wrongdoing, had never even offered contrition, clearly never had any remorse whatsoever. i imagine that you have had an experience or two like this as well…the reason for my sharing.
it was a couple days later that the reassuring memes came across my screen.
the timing of the universe is sometimes exquisite. it gave me time enough to ponder what had happened but not enough time to immerse fully back in the hurt.
the golden cord in the cloud was there and then it wasn’t. it dissipated as our relationship with the sun changed, light moving in the sky.
the cello line soared and then dropped to a whisper, the piano steady behind it, chording a base harmony, structural and necessary.
the universe stood steady for me, for us, as we processed – once again – what these people had done – people who we trusted, to whom we felt connection, with whom we shared community. it reminded me – it reminded us – that – just as in the IG meme – we had slipped through their hands and that we should feel gratitude instead of loss. some things are just not meant to stay the same. including relationships.
and the mixture of emotions joined the whisper of cello and slipped into the shimmer of gold dust in the cloud. and the cloud moved through the sky and just as quickly as it had shone up, suddenly the gold dust was gone. looking for the next heart that needed it.
*****
read DAVID’s thoughts this D.R. THURSDAY
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