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distinctly nebulous. [kerri’s blog on two artists tuesday]

i’m not sure i ever noticed the shadow. for decades i’ve looked at sky and clouds and contrails and rows and floes of angel hair (oops – off-track, there)….but i don’t know that i ever noticed the shadow.

there are days that some new learning just utterly astounds you – even something really basic, something that has been there all along, something as simple as some word you’ve incorrectly spelled all-your-life. the possibilities are endless. we are fortunate that way.

we were out the other day and someone asked us if we were “retired“. we laughed, mostly because that isn’t an easy question for us. “retired” implies that one has completed the working portion of their life and has moved into a phase wherein one collects some sort of pension or retirement and one does, well, whatever one wants.

we answered that our son calls us “nebulously retired“. the guy who asked us laughed. and we added that we are artists and artists don’t really retire. we don’t report to a certain place each day at a certain time for a certain wage but we don’t stop working either. artistry is an ongoing thing, whether or not it earns you a pension.

artistry also calls you to keep learning, to keep asking questions, to be intrigued, to hone your skills, to work at it – no matter your age or stage.

and so, the contrail shadow made me curious and i looked it up – this seeming optical illusion of line on the bank of clouds that were, apparently, below it. it is a little mind-twisting. but oh-so-interesting and photo-worthy.

though photography has not been any official part of my artistry it is something i have always loved. ever since my sweet momma and poppo gave me a 35mm camera for my early-high-school-graduation, i have carried cameras around with me. with the advent of phone cameras that are better than most older digital cameras, i am even more zealous now. the contrail invited me to take its picture. and it’s too easy.

and, yes, it’s too easy to just keep going, keep creating, keep learning – even nebulously. we both keep it fluid – this relationship with our artistry. the line is vague, the distinction is indistinct, blurry.

we are sometimes the contrail and sometimes the shadow and sometimes the clouds upon which the shadow is cast. and we like it that way. distinctly nebulous.

*****

read DAVID’s thoughts this TWO ARTISTS TUESDAY

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farmstand happy. [kerri’s blog on two artists tuesday]

standing in the outbuilding on the farm, we both felt a little bit gleeful. the sweet peppers in front of us were so, well, freaking happy. their glossy lime green, tangerine orange and lipstick red funky shapes just about did us in.

and that wasn’t the whole of it. there were mini white cucumbers and multicolored corking jalapeños, gorgeous tomatoes and giant squash, the freshest parsley and every kind of onion. it was just too much. we were ecstatic.

between the lettuce-elimination campaign and all the food recalls – in a country that seemingly doesn’t want us to actually eat – we have found a new way that isn’t new at all: the farmstands.**

in less than two weeks we have been to farmstands four times. we have loaded up with eggplant, zucchini and tomatoes from a tiny stand out a-ways and we already have a list to go back. we are just weary of the worry about produce coming in to grocery stores from places where some process or another has caused alarm about its food safety.

and we have a new source for lettuce too, so take that! you lettuce-spoilers. our town has a hydroponic grower who offers various lettuces (their butter lettuce is divinely fresh!) and microgreens we are anxious to try.

we spent labor day weekend food-prepping: quinoa tabouli, homemade tomato sauce, basil cubes (from the basil in our garden). we made spaghetii squash for the sauce, had eggplant and zucchini on last week’s menu, fabulously fresh tomato and cucumber sandwiches for lunch. it’s time to push back and eating from as much local as we can get is how we can do it.

they recognized us when we came back the second and third times and they suggested we consider a community supported agriculture food share (CSA) for next year. we’ll see. it’s a possibility and they could clearly see that in our exuberance – as we continue to ride gleefully on our farmstand wave of happy.

*****

read DAVID’s thoughts this TWO ARTISTS TUESDAY

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** beaver creek gardens and funkin farm farmstands

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drink it in. [kerri’s blog on two artists tuesday]

we moved the sweet potato vine from the ladder on the deck. between the heat and the rain, it was struggling. we weren’t sure it was going to make it, which seems odd for a sweet potato vine, usually pretty invincible.

no matter, we thought, it needed to be moved so that it might have a chance. we transplanted it into a bigger pot and placed it on top of barney – a spot with maybe a bit more sun.

and then we watched it.

with few green leaves still on the vine, we feared it would not last.

but that little sweet potato surprised us. with little-engine-that-could chutzpah, it soaked up the sun, its perch on barney, visits from squirrels and cardinals, house sparrows and finches. and it started to recuperate.

it greened up – into that really rich chartreuse – life-affirming lime-green fabulousness. more leaves sprouted their way from the vine that started to extend across the keyboard. it started to look thicker, more vibrant, even verdant.

and – in the way that we see things – we drank in the simple-but-outstanding gorgeous juxtaposition of green and aging piano wood. stunning.

it is certain. color can help.

with all the ugly in this world right now, we could stare at that for a time and breathe.

*****

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time to fly. [kerri’s blog on two artists tuesday]

it is of note that i had to look it up – the first day of school in our town. i am no longer in touch with the district calendar; it no longer has any real bearing on our calendar.

today is the first day. wisconsin has some kind of rule (protecting late summer tourism) that school start must be in the month of september, so september 1st it is.

there is a certain feeling i get in my stomach on the first day of school – even when i, and now my children, have far outgrown this day. though i loved attending school back in the day, it was hard when summer had drawn to a close and my children had to go back to the structure of the school calendar. i missed them being at home. it was hard when i – during the years i taught in public schools – had to adhere to that structured calendar, those structured days. and then, my children’s college years – which presented even more mom-challenges for me. change is tough and redefining oneself as school starts gets those belly-butterflies going.

we drove past one of the colleges in our town and starting talking about jobs for which we had applied at the various higher level education institutions in our town. in the end we were both grateful to have not received offers from any of them. we talked about our lives as artists and that having our own businesses – as difficult as it is, with many pressures and worries – was more our cup of tea. there is no summer-ending-start date or summer-nearing-end date, no defined work hours or time-off dates or in-service dates for your own business. there is also no salary chart or healthcare plan, retirement savings or pension program, employee assistance program or life insurance. nevertheless, our businesses – individually and mutually – have been that which gives us flight and that is what we wish for all, recognizing that everyone will choose differently.

in these days of an administration that pushes back on actual learning of actual facts about actual things that actually happened, i wonder how teachers are dealing with the dumbing-down, the skeletonizing of our country’s history, of literature, of the arts, of science.

i want to believe that children – as they start school again – have – at their fingertips – a wide open horizon that invites them to find their own compass and to follow in the direction or directions they choose.

i would like to believe that they will be encouraged – by our government as well as their teachers – to explore and to dream, to research and to check their work, to seek answers as well as questions.

i would like to believe that they will see that anything is possible for them – if they work at it.

on this first day of school, i wish for each school child to be able to run at the horizon and jump, following their natural instinct to learn, to grow and, mostly, to fly.

*****

read DAVID’s thoughts this TWO ARTISTS TUESDAY

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coleus-rich. [kerri’s blog on two artists tuesday]

it was $2.49. it sat in the midst of lots of other tiny coleus plants, on sale. the colors spoke to us and, though we weren’t planning on potting a coleus, we couldn’t resist the sale. this little plant has literally done better than any other plant we have purchased this year, including the two sweet potato vines we have placed on ladders – which usually rock, but have been just too inundated with rain and heat this year.

just goes to show you that something doesn’t have to be really expensive in order for it to be exquisite.

the color patterns on this coleus remind me of things you did as a kid: when you put celery in a tall glass and added water and food coloring. then you watched the food dye climb up the xylem of the stalk. or maybe when you went to summer rec and made cool tie-dye t-shirts (when you weren’t making braided plastic-lacing lanyards).

we spent time on the deck studying our plants and potting stand. the weather has really taken a toll on our herbs and tomatoes. they will likely not last until the bitter end of summer this year, which is too bad in a season when you can’t feel comfortable with store-bought parsley or basil or cilantro or, well, many produce items. or eggs. or bacon. or beef. or granola. or – the big one – lettuce. it all makes one’s head spin…so we are sad to have a garden that is diminishing too soon.

our coleus, however, is apparently going to gleefully hang out for a while. one piece that broke off from strong winds in a thunderstorm is inside in a jar of water. it has rooted and we’ll plant it, hoping to carry the happy coleus into the fall and beyond.

we budgeted and planned for our potting stand and went a bit over, having to replace a few herbs along the way. the extra was fine with us – we can cut back somewhere else – for we find this little garden a joy. and in the middle of the salmonella-e.coli-cyclospora scares, we have been grateful for access to its harvest. though the produce return-on-investment may not be the same as buying bulk produce or herbs at the store, harvesting our own has – once again – inspired us. and this year – in particular – it kept us from buying anything worrisome. maybe next year we will add a few more veggies to our garden. maybe a galvanized raised garden or two.

in the meanwhile – between the time that the potting stand no longer produces and the time we plant again – in fall and winter as we plot a new crop of plants and think about the possibility of a farmstand subscription (CSA), we will glance over at our indoor coleus and remember the riches of this summer – even the ones that were just $2.49.

*****

read DAVID’s thoughts this TWO ARTISTS TUESDAY

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most alive. [kerri’s blog on two artists tuesday]

in a non-rigorous scientific-community-questioned experiment back around 2000, a japanese researcher exposed water molecules to positive and negative input – commentary, music, sounds that are easily sorted into validating or dissing, softer reassurances or harsh aggression. the water molecules that had been privy to positivity turned into beautiful ice crystals while the water molecules that had been subjected to negativity froze into ugly shapes. the theory was that vibrational input – all the energy input – played a part in the effect on water, and the experiment posited a direct connect to how vibrational energy affects us as people.

whether or not this experiment had all the controls and data and science it purported doesn’t really matter to me. what matters is that this makes sense.

being kind, generous, positive, encouraging to someone, stroking someone with words of goodness is entirely the opposite of berating someone, demeaning them, being hostile toward them. clearly.

when you walk into the trader joe’s grocery store nearest us, the first thing you see – on your right – are bins of flowers. it is a wall of color, of beauty. we slowly browse through them all – so many are different than what your would find at a typical florist, these are intriguing and, obviously, very popular – as there are shoppers with armloads of these bouquets.

we haven’t bought flowers often there, though i have stopped and admired them each time we have entered the store. flowers weren’t in the budget so i enjoyed them at the store and thought about one day starting a new tradition of having fresh flowers around us, any time of year. my sweet poppo would buy my momma grocery store flowers for the little table in the foyer of their house and she loved that tradition, the ritual of changing the flowers, of having beauty right by the front door.

the last two times we went – which isn’t too often because it’s about 40 minutes away – we picked up a bundle of flowers. last time we picked up red hypericum, this time purple eryngium. each time we brought home a little posey of something uniquely different to us, something just simply so pretty we couldn’t pass it by. despite other shoppers leaving with multiple bundles, we have been quite pleased with ourselves, carrying out of the store a sweet bouquet of infamous tj flowers.

at home – in a ball jar on the bistro table by the windows in the sunroom – we enjoy our flowers every single day, for this is the place we sit most often. and every single day that we have enjoyed these flowers – this $4.99 investment in ourselves – we have felt the positive self-message that we are worthy of them.

it doesn’t take much. tiny affirmations. words of support, assurance, validation, self-belief. little gestures. big empowering. everything in between.

if i had to guess, i would think that having trader joe’s flowers around might be a catalyst – one among many others – for becoming beautiful crystals. that – even more than the 60% of our bodies that are water – our body is 100% beautiful. and in the overwhelming presence of that kind of beauty, we are most alive.

“we begin to find and become ourselves when we notice how we are already found, already truly, entirely, wildly, messily, marvelously who we were born to be.” (anne lamott)

*****

read DAVID’s thoughts this TWO ARTISTS TUESDAY

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all the phases. [kerri’s blog on two artists tuesday]

the sowthistle can’t help but stand in all the phases of its life at the same time.

and i wonder what wisdom it can impart by doing just that – standing simultaneously in bud through flower through feathery seed into senescence.

being able to see the stage that is next, the stage that was before, the stage that was the beginning, the stage that will be the end – perhaps this is perspective-arranging, perhaps it zeros one in – on what is right now.

i wonder if the sowthistle thinks about any of this. does it base any of its thistling decisions on this omnipresent view of the arc of life, on the conglomerate-rock plant approach – or does it just live, detached from stressing, disconnected from the mindset of striding through stages upon which it has little impact?

and what about us? what if we could see our whole life right in front of us? what if we knew – from beginning to end – how it would all shake out?

don’t we, though? sort of?

don’t we know that we will somehow travel through these stages – the beginning, the middle, the end – that we will somehow grow and change and celebrate and grieve and jump and hang back and be active and sedentary, brilliantly productive and passively idle, bowled over and resilient, profoundly angst-filled and radically happy, loving and beloved, young and – hopefully – old.

is the sowthistle consistently sanguine, glass-half-full, amazed at simply living?

as we hiked by this bit of meadow, sowthistle wild on the side of the trail, i was struck by the all-in-one-frame of thistle – all its life cycle – a life arc in one tiny space of dirt.

and in the way that nature reminds us – all the time – i was immediately aware of my own life arc, my own mysterious timeline.

and mary oliver whispered – once again – this time from the tangle of buds and flowers and seeds – because she can never ask this enough – “what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?”

*****

read DAVID’s thoughts this TWO ARTISTS TUESDAY

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facts and fire. [kerri’s blog on two artists tuesday]

i read these words recently:

“facts are stubborn things.” *

no matter what someone wants you to believe about something, facts will stand the test of time, they will rise to the surface like a bobber on a lake, floating in incandescent shine into the air, ready for discovery. facts will – and should – lead the way, speaking loudly, burning down all the detriment of machinated false narrative, twisted stories that serve no purpose to truth.

facts. the intense combust of silence.

facts. silence. fire.

i have chosen facts.

i have chosen fire.

*****

read DAVID’s thoughts this TWO ARTISTS TUESDAY

66 and 19 (mixed media)

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*heather delaney reese wrote these words in a recent post, but they are also attributed to president john adams in the history of this country.


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dragon in the sky. [kerri’s blog on two artists tuesday]

three million acres is no small thing. three million acres that were protected. three million acres that were grand staircase-escalante and bears ears national monuments. three million acres now open for business.

gluttony is alive and well in this nation.

it’s absolutely sickening.

and the dragon in the sky roared – fire coming from its mouth. because “these remarkable curiosities [ ] have required all the cunning skill of nature thousands of years to prepare.” (the house committee on public lands – circa 1871)

and it brings me back to this, to which i have arrived before: reverence.

they have no reverence.

and today – a few days before you will read this – the land around the boundary waters is on fire. photographs depict enormous infernos. it is all burning up.

and in colorado – fossil-fuel-fueled-climate-change wildfire in beautiful forests and on mountains and racing across open land.

and alaska and utah and florida and the pacific northwest and the southwest and the northeast and…

and major flooding in missouri, in texas.

and the mid-atlantic east coast and the southeast and the northeast and…

and cyclospora making its way into the food and water of americans across the nation. no lettuce and no berries and no produce and…

and people – on their way to work – executed by government officials who – mistakenly – identified them as targets.

and war.

and insane announcements eliminating medical research.

and social programs.

and voting rights.

and the decimation of wildlife protections.

and military spending way, way, way over the top.

and public adoration of brutal authoritarian figures by this administration.

and heartless sycophants, a conscience-less cheering squad, a team dedicated to the destruction of democracy.

and all manner of evil intentions.

no wonder there is a dragon in the sky. i can’t imagine how pissed the universe is.

*****

read DAVID’s thoughts this TWO ARTISTS TUESDAY

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indeterminate like tomatoes. [kerri’s blog on two artists tuesday]

in 1992 david sold a painting to a man he has not spoken to since. a couple days ago he received a message on his website from this person – reaching out to tell him how much he has enjoyed this painting for the last almost-35 years. they mutually agreed that the reaching-out-reaching-back was like a homecoming.

this is why painters paint, why recording artists record, why writers write.

because sometime – in the vast sometime that is time – and somewhere – in the vast somewhere that is out there – someone is touched by a work and actually reaches out to let you know.

from conception to completed work – is anything really complete without an audience? – we work to bring to life an idea, a question, a texture, a gesture, an emotion.

just like these cherry tomatoes we pay attention…check on the necessities – like sun, water and sources of inspiration, muslin-tie up the branches that grow long and lanky, heavy with early buds and new fruit – protecting the muse, watch for pests – like aphids or a lack of confidence, hope for the best – tomatoes in the end or something worthy to release into the world. and then we set it free – this piece of us – so that we can start what’s next.

i learned early in the studio that to hold on too tightly to a track of music is to never be able to move on, to never grow, to never period the sentence. despite any lack of total perfection – for is anything ever really, truly perfect? – i learned that good is – actually -good and, by accepting that, i could produce a finished product.

the recording label our son owns posted a meme one day which read, “just make it EXIST first. you can make it good later.”

I laughed reading this. it goes hand and hand with the john cage quote i have in my studio: “begin anywhere“.

it is both in the trepidation of the beginning – and the anxiety of the finishing – where artists can get lost. it takes practice – and courage – to start. it takes practice – and courage – to finish.

it never hurts to hear from someone that a work has made their world a little bit better, even that a work has accompanied them – for years and years – on their walk in the world.

the cherry tomato ripens. if all the conditions are right, it’s inevitable. and, in the way of indeterminate tomato plants – which “continue to grow and blossom and produce fruit throughout the entire season” – more tomatoes will ripen – even if you pick some and consume them, even if some fall off the vining branch. the plant keeps on, regardless. “there are no gardening mistakes, only experiments.” (janet kilburn phillips)

so, too, it is with artistry. we are indeterminate – it is the imperative – we will continue to grow and blossom and experiment and produce more fruit our entire seasons – especially if all the conditions are right, especially when we know the fruit resonated with someone in vast sometime-somewhere.

no matter, though. the tomato plants keep growing wildly in these weirdly wisconsin sub-tropical summer days. despite it all.

and the artists do as well.

“…stick with it no matter what. tell your story.” (barkersounds)

*****

read DAVID’s thoughts this TWO ARTISTS TUESDAY

FARM
TO TABLE

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