reverse threading

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what the hell are we doing? [kerri’s blog on flawed wednesday]

the drive was going to be about 9-10 hours or so. we knew that the front end would be belabored by traffic – taking hours to get through the city, but, once on the interstate, figured we’d be cruising. ahh….not the best of figuring.

there was the hour we spent at the delaware water gap…not outside enjoying the views and a trail…but inside big red, crawling our way out of new jersey into pennsylvania.

then the hour plus we spent just lingering – barely moving – through this one section of i80 in the very wide state of PA – where the department of transportation had decided that – for miles – it would be necessary to have cones blocking a lane so that eventually – miles later – they could do roadwork. now, i am all for safety for the workers on these roads, but cones for miles with no indication of any work is a tad bit frustrating.

so, then, finally, we were moving along. we had a whole bunch more hours to go – about 4-5 when we stopped about 70 miles from the ohio border to get gas and have a little pit stop. we could see the sky getting darker to the west and thought we’d get ahead of the necessities.

and then we got our first tornado warning. warning, not watch.

d pumped gas while i checked the weather radar. it looked ugly to our west and the prediction was for extended storms, hail, extreme wind and, yes, perhaps a tornado or two.

we pulled next to the station and sat while the first of the storms came through, pummeling us with torrential rain and wind. we were grateful we weren’t driving in it.

pulling up the radar again, i looked at some points along our journey to that night’s airbnb. things did not look good for the rest of the evening. it was already close to 5, we had been driving for 9 hours by then and we still had hours to go – through the weather mess on our app. we didn’t quite know what to do.

i looked around as we sat there in that lot. to my left – high on a hill next to us – sat what looked like either a hotel or a condo building which, given the exit we had taken, didn’t seem likely. pulling up google maps, i found out it was, indeed, a hotel.

i pulled up their website.

just to check.

because we were already tired and the road ahead looked pretty scary and long.

about a half hour later we checked into the hotel, forfeiting our airbnb – erring on the side of safety. the couple behind us in line at the front desk – about our age – were doing the same thing, forgoing their reservations several hours down the road.

many times over that night and the next day we marveled at the serendipity of the hotel-on-the-hill location next to us and were grateful for it and for our ponderous decision.

the dawning morning fog the next day lifted before we started driving and there was no indication of storm until we were closer to home. we had tornado watches for the last couple hours while we were driving, which made us jittery – well, it definitely made me jittery.

the tornado sirens went off when we got home.

because, well, climate change is real. global warming is real. weather events are becoming extreme as a result of humans’ lack of care about greenhouse gases, fossil fuels and pollutants in the air, water cycles. ridiculously hot heatwaves, intense droughts, insane amounts of precipitation and flooding, supersized hail, coastal storm surges, damaging winds, severe widespread wildfires, and destructive tornadoes caused by warmer, more humid air. this could potentially all be catastrophic, yet the current administration is ignoring all the signs of peril to our earth, gluttonous greed intentionally perpetuating the damage.

a few days later, in our backyard and starting to prepare the gardens for spring, we looked up.

the clouds – mammous and with these rope-like threads – were suddenly overhead. the same kind of clouds as the night we arrived home. we both sighed, suddenly nervous about what front was coming.

there have been plenty of scary looking clouds. there have been plenty of emergencies across our land. there has been plenty of devastation. there have been plenty of catastrophes due to weather events.

“the united nations intergovernmental panel on climate change’s sixth assessment report in 2021 (five years ago!!!) noted that the human-caused rise in greenhouse gases increased the frequency and intensity of extreme weather events worldwide.”

you gotta wonder when those “in charge” might care.

i read a quote while perusing around the issues of this extreme weather, climate change, this earth. it seems sadly apropos: “unfortunately for some of those people, it won’t hit home for them until it really hits home for them.”

is that what we are waiting for?

what the hell are we doing?

*****

read DAVID’s thoughts this FLAWED WEDNESDAY

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the so-called NYM. [kerri’s blog on merely-a-thought monday]

though they would have you believe that everything happens fast in new york city- that it’s all “in the flashiest flash”, that it’s all practically instantaneous – i would offer up driving across the george washington bridge or a spin on the cross bronx or the cross island or maybe the long island expressway – as counterpoint to that point. nothing happens fast in or on any of those places. it is slower than molasses and any pretense of traversing across the waterways to get to the other side – rapidly – would be dispelled as soon as you plant yourself in a vehicle somewhere near the gwb.

the thing about being on a bridge for a long period of time is that you are on a bridge for a long period of time. you can actually feel the sway of the bridge, the movement of the bridge, the other thousands upon thousands of vehicles on the bridge. it can be alarming if you are bridge-phobic, height-phobic, traffic-phobic, noise-phobic, phobic about going too slow, phobic about being late, phobic about big trucks surrounding you (if you are upper level), phobic about dark places that are underneath a whole ‘nother level of vehicles suspended on pavement and traveling above you (if you are lower level)…many phobias, so little time.

the problem is – this is the way there. to get to long island from new jersey – coming from the west, one must cross a bridge. you have a choice – the gwb or the verrazano. you can cross staten island or you can cross manhattan. the choice isn’t exactly favorable either way.

but – those are your driving-your-car options.

we thought about leaving – heading west – a different way…maybe driving north up along the hudson and crossing at the tappan zee, taking the ‘high road’ so-to-speak and bumping up into rockland county, taking a roundabout route to try and achieve that infamous new york minute stuff.

we chose not to, though, and went the “traditional” way, hoping we had timed it well, that – this very day, this very hour – the planets would align and conditions would be different and we would sail right through.

ahhh. no such luck.

maybe, in the end, the new york minute IS actually a thing. because anything – in comparison to the sloth-inspired-turtle’s pace on the roads to the city, through the city, across the city – would be faster. and a new york minute – that blink-of-an-eye-jiffiest-jiffy takes on different meaning.

*****

read DAVID’s thoughts this MERELY-A-THOUGHT MONDAY

life in the fast lane

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stopping on the way. [kerri’s blog on not-so-flawed wednesday]

the woods are different out east. the rhododendron is en masse and the scratchy underbrush is minimal, so you can walk in the trees, weaving your way in and out of the stands of these tall towers.

we had a bit of time before the sun set to walk on this special retreat land, stretch our legs from roadtripping, sit on the balcony with a charcuterie we had prepared ahead of our drive, watch the sun go down.

it was peaceful and – truly – just what we needed. the wind sailing through the pine trees near us was soothing, the scent of spring in the allegheny-appalachian mountains would bring us down from the drone of the interstate. it was the perfect stopping ground.

our accommodations were simple and inexpensive – a small studio above a garage – but with a kitchen so we could warm up the dinner we brought with us and make breakfast in the morning. we were thrilled to have such a serene setting as we knew the next day would bring the hectic chaos of the city, the bridges and the cross-bronx-cross-island craziness.

early the next morning with our coffee we strategized about how calmly we would approach the traffic of the day. we took back roads to the interstate, learning a bit of how rural-mountain folks are living, wondering where the grocery store was, wondering what the roads are like in the dead of winter.

we hadn’t gone too far that morning when on the side of the road were two wild turkeys. just as we approached one turkey decided to take off and fly right in front of big red. i slammed on the brakes, determined not to hit this very-slow-to-get-momentum-flying creature right in front of my windshield, like a lumbering skyvan. thankfully, the turkey made it to the other side of the road safely and we continued on. i felt a bit shaken. but d looked up the significance of this large grounded creature – particularly when one flies right in front of your vehicle. a reminder of abundance, of courage, of tenacity, of openness and readiness – all these attributes of new beginnings and changes were positive trade-offs for the frightening close-up of a turkey in flight. we chose to adopt these meanings and i quietly thanked the turkey for the good omens.

we left behind the forests, sandstone outcroppings, striated vertical walls, and the mountains, trading it for the shore, forsythia, stands of woods, sand and bluffs. and though we didn’t wake up the next day in a sanctuary forest, we sipped our coffee watching the harbor, its water still, perfectly reflecting sailboats and skiffs moored, buoys out past the dock.

a different kind of peace, i felt like i had come home.

*****

read DAVID’s thoughts this NOT-SO-FLAWED WEDNESDAY

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our theme song. [kerri’s blog on merely-a-thought monday]

i have listened to this song – rascal flatts’ stand – just shy of a million times. on every trip back and forth across the northern part of this country – driving from the midwest to the east coast to perform, sell cds, do a radio or tv gig – it would be blaring on the stereo, this song from the me and my gang cd on repeat.

because we have all discovered life IS like a novel with the end ripped out. every bit of careful planning, every end result we purport to know will happen, every time we are sure of it all, something else happens to throw an itty-bitty wrench into things, to wreak havoc on our tidy landscape, to make the horizon a tad bit blurry, to utterly decimate what we thought would happen.

i suppose we can take it all as it comes, lie down and let the steamroller roll over us – succumb – in any and every arena of life.

but the chutzpah that has come with listening to this song almost a million times – the chutzpah that comes with, well, just living itself – changes that succumbing-to-the-steamroller tune.

“cause when push comes to shove you taste what you’re made of/ you might bend ’til you break, cause it’s all you can take/ on your knees, you look up, decide you’ve had enough/ you get mad, you get strong, wipe your hands, shake it off then you stand, then you stand…”

and so, i find myself driving again – across the northern part of this country – from the midwest to the east coast – standing.

because when you can do something about that which has the potential of undermining every single thing, when you can do something about that which is life-arc-havoc-wreaking, when you can do something about that which has been too much – when you have decided you’ve had enough – when you are mad – when you get strong – then you must stand – in any and every arena of life.

“every time you get up and get back in the race/ one more small piece of you starts to fall into place…”

we blasted the song over the external speaker our boy gave us – because big red doesn’t have a cd player or any capacity to play music that is not on the radio or a cassette. i sang along. loud.

d listened to the lyrics. over and over again.

and suggested that this song be our theme song now.

*****

read DAVID’s thoughts this MERELY-A-THOUGHT MONDAY

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a cupcake toast. [kerri’s blog on merely-a-thought monday]

we have few vices. very few, actually. we love coffee. we enjoy a glass of wine. and chocolate – well – sometimes chocolate makes the list (more often for d than for me.)

so when our dear dear friends made us a care package for a recent roadtrip, they included all three. a bottle of wine, a box (yes! a whole box!) of hostess cupcakes, and a bottle of stok cold brew coffee. there were other goodies too – nuts and chocolate bars, munchies galore.

the first night was following ten hours of driving. though we have decided we prefer (wholeheartedly) to drive road trips in reasonable daylight hours now, we were past sunset and were driving the last of our journey that night in the dark. naturally, this was on windy, hilly, non-lit roads with the presence of deer, both alive and deceased. stressful. we went slow and were anxious to get to our accommodations in a little town in the mountains.

we warmed up the pre-prepared dinner we had brought with us and sat down at the tiny counter with a glass of wine to eat, exhaling from a long day and the last hour of our travel.

though we haven’t indulged in a hostess cupcake in forever, it was our obvious choice for dessert (gluten or no, it was clear!). we cheered our glasses and raised our cupcake to jen and brad as we sat, talking about our trip and the gift of having people traveling alongside with you, cheering you on, buoying your every mile.

because the hostess cupcake and the bottle of wine and the stok weren’t so much about the hostess cupcake and the wine and the coffee as they were about the talismans of support and love.

there is nothing like people walking – or driving – or flying – or just holding steady with you.

we raise our hostess cupcake to any of you out there who do the same for others. i’m pretty sure that – THAT – is what being in the world is about.

*****

read DAVID’s thoughts this MERELY-A-THOUGHT MONDAY

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for the little things and the big things. [kerri’s blog on d.r. thursday]

we drove home with the heat blasting and the windows open. all 263 miles.

we drove slower than usual – cruise control on – smiling at everyone who passed us as we toodled along in the right lane.

we stopped every hour.

each time, we raised the hood, set a timer, stretched our legs. we readied the old beach towel and the funnel, got out the big jug of coolant and waited till it was safe to open the radiator cap.

and littlebabyscion – with whom i had had a few conversations prior to getting on the road – hung in there.

each time we opened the radiator cap to reveal that the coolant level had not changed. the red coolant light – which had intermittently flashed at us numerous times on the way up north – causing great distress – never flashed at us on the the way home.

when we got off the interstate for the last eleven miles or so, i turned off the heat. and LBS dutifully and safely got us home. no flashing lights on the dashboard. no drop in the level of coolant in the radiator.

so it’s all a bit of a mystery – this curious and first-time problem – the flashing light, the seriously depleted coolant on our way up. i have a few theories and, frankly, i’m hoping they are correct, that our brilliant mechanic will concur. that would mean that nothing is really horribly wrong with LBS. and that would mean we can continue our journey together. 276,000 miles and beyond.

we – david and i – were seriously serious about staying in the calm-zone as we dealt with this car issue while on a little time away and, mostly, while driving home. though i, initially, was pretty upset about the potential problem that this could represent, my conversations with LBS were fervent and d and i were determined to stay in the zen-zone all the way home. taking the over-the-phone advice of our mechanic, knowing that our dear friends were not-too-far behind us and that 20 was waiting at home with dinner and ready to help in any way were all sources of infinite reassurance. that kind of support gives one confidence to keep going, to not immerse in worry, to just trust it all.

it’s been a long, long time since i have driven on an interstate with the windows wide open. it’s a noisy place. and yet, the kwik-trip, the fox river park, the giant truck stop all provided us with quieter places to stop, places to wait it out, places to be celebratory each time we opened LBS’ radiator cap and then packed it all back up and drove on for the next hour.

this was an in-the-lull lesson for us. any moments of upset were not helpful. instead, staying focused on the things we could do, the help we had been offered, the steadiness of this little xb – these all gave us the ability to stay in the moment and not lose the lull.

i’m not positive we would have passed the lull-test alone. we are infinitely grateful to have not felt alone. that is the power of community for each of us – this abundance of support. when we wouldn’t have normally asked for help, it was there anyway. we just need to remember it’s right there. for the little things and the big things.

*****

read DAVID’s thoughts this D.R. THURSDAY

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the great river road. [kerri’s blog on two artists tuesday]

we would have missed it. but because we are backroads people, we had a chance to revel in it.

the mississippi was grand next to us as we drove the wisconsin great river road south – stunning, really – winding its way along the wisconsin-minnesota border. driving the interstate both directions may have gotten us there faster, but would not have had the same effect on us.

the first time we drove into wisconsin together – from the west – we drove this river road. we lumbered along in a budget truck with david’s stufff in the back, moving him here from seattle. i wanted him to see just how beautiful the bluffs were, just how magnificent the river – both from soaring heights and up-close and personal. i wanted him to have a memorable entrance into his new home state.

we hadn’t been that route since. so it was pretty special to take it home again. we stopped along the shoulder of the road to look at the farm where – bumbling along in our budget truck – we had found our dogdog. we remembered the hilly driveway up, the time spent with farmer don, the other aussies running free and this one black puppy, stealing our hearts. it was with more than a little anticipation we stopped in the little towns along the way to window shop a bit, to get a bite for lunch. we ambled and time – and everything else – stood still.

our bit of time with cousins and a drive along the misi-ziibi gave us just the space and breath we needed. the sweet phase has some deliberately quieter – more peaceful – moments than whatever the rest of the phases were. it is not burdened with speed or competition. it has intentional appreciation of things we may have missed otherwise.

the back way added – i dunno – maybe forty minutes drive time in a full-day’s drive. not a bad return on investment. we’ll pick it every time.

*****

read DAVID’S thoughts this TWO ARTISTS TUESDAY

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squeaking with excitement. [kerri’s blog on saturday morning smack-dab.]

finally. a roadtrip!

roadtrip: a journey made by car or bus etc.

we are making it by littlebabyscion. again. finally!

it’s been a long while since we have taken a roadtrip of any length – and, truth be told, this one isn’t really all thaaaat long either. but it’s longer than just a few hours and so we needed to prep.

we washed and cleaned out LBS for the journey. it had also been a while – and for the last few days we have felt mighty proud driving around in a pristine vehicle (ok, as pristine as 275000 miles can get – shy of sandblasting and repainting the rims – as our son has suggested). we’ve made lists of what to bring and we are carefully planning snacks for in the car because we cannot drive any distance without them.

to say we are excited is an understatement. we also have made sure we have all kinds of other roadtrip paraphernalia – like duct tape, rubber bands, an extra bottle of engine oil, twist-ties, a flashlight – because with 275k one never knows what one might encounter. hopefully, we won’t need any of that. at all. none of it. (hoping that LBS is paying attention…)

it will all be over in a flash. like any vacation or mini-vacation. but the anticipation is delicious and we – like the hosts waiting for us on the other side of the road part of our roadtrip – are squeaking with excitement.

*****

read DAVID’S thoughts this SATURDAY MORNING

SMACK-DAB. ©️ 2024 kerrianddavid.com

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looongdistance. [kerri’s blog on saturday morning smack-dab.]

sometimes we get carried away. we think we are still – say – in our thirties – or maybe forties – eh, even our fifties – and we get in littlebabyscion and just driiiiive. without stopping. we love a good roadtrip!

this is no longer what it used to be.

it USED to be that we could drive looongdistance without getting out to stretch. it USED to be that we could drive looongdistance and sip on venti coffees to our heart’s content. it USED to be that we could drive looongdistance without finding restrooms. it USED to be that we’d drive looongdistance and snack our way across the country. it USED to be that we could blithely hop out of the vehicle at any point and skip around the rest area. it USED to be that we could drive late into the wee hours of the night and still be wide awake. it USED to be we could drive 17 or 19 hours in a day. it USED to be that we were intrepid.

this is no longer what it used to be.

now, we drive, still snacking our way across the country because some things never change. but after about two hours we stop. we locate a restroom. we slooowly peel ourselves off the seat of the car and unbend our bentbodies. we stretch, groaning. we ponder walking away from the car. maybe we get a lesssssliquid espresso. we study google maps. we calculate our next stop. we check on when the sun is setting. we take a deep breath. we drive again. and repeat. and we love it! even now.

roadtrips r us.

but they’re no longer what they used to be.

*****

read DAVID’S thoughts this SATURDAY MORNING

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what i need. [saturday morning smack-dab.]

i am a homebody. i truly love home.

but – juxtaposed on the same life-wave-riding surfboard – i love to get away. i love roadtrips and adventure, exploring backroads, immersing in new places. though i am fed noticing the extraordinary in the familiar, i thrive on images of the unfamiliar. more than once i have cried entering a canyon or at mountain-range first glimpse or surrounded by the scent of a lodgepole pine forest or the quiet of an empty trail or the quaking of aspen leaves.

so i yearn for these places – the ones we have been to and have loved and the ones we dream about.

i’m not high-maintenance when it comes to vacations. i’m not a resort-type or a cruise-type, not a disney-type or an amusement-park-type. i don’t need all-inclusive or my bed turned-down. i don’t need all-you-can-eat-any-time-of-day-or-night. i don’t need fancy or plush or luxurious. i definitely don’t need contrived.

it’s pretty simple. what i do need – is a little or big getaway. short distance, long distance. time to leave, see new things, experience new places, feel the sun from a different latitude or longitude. and then time to go home and feel the hygge that is ever-present back here, the moments that go by perhaps a little underappreciated, to feel the here and now without regret or longing, a chance to revive my homebody-ness.

*****

read DAVID’S thoughts this SATURDAY MORNING

SMACK-DAB. ©️ 2023 kerrianddavid.com
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