to say i am beside myself would be to minimize this moment in history.
what i can’t understand is that this whole ENTIRE country is not beside itself.
what i can’t understand is that half this country is voting for a candidate who has no intention of furthering democracy, no intention of goodness, every intention of autocratic power, the demolition of human rights, acts seeking revenge and retribution.
what i can’t understand is the explaining-away – the sane-washing – the absolute worship of this incoherent, unworthy, unhinged, unfit maga candidate.
what i can’t understand is the hatred, the hideously ugly maga agenda.
what i can’t understand are members of this populace who are unswerving, unconcerned about fascism, about autocratic governing, about abolishing the constitution of this country.
we are the generation that has this moment in our hands. we are the people.
please consider reality.
stop sloughing off all the warning signs that we are standing on a dangerous political precipice.
stop viewing through rose-colored adoring glasses this candidate who could literally give not one sh*t about you – no matter who you are.
stop sickeningly acting like this maga candidate is the second coming. subscribing to that is an insult to your intelligence, an insult to the universe and to any deity you might believe in.
decide if you want fascism or democracy. and, if you decide fascism, research what that really means – for you, your family, your community, your state, your country. and then ask yourself why you would choose such tyrannical ultranationalist extreme ideology.
vote with conscience and with morality, knowing that one day you will no longer stand on this earth but you will have made a difference for those who came behind you, you will have created the world they will live in.
choose that world with great deliberation, meticulously, very, very carefully.
gobsmacked is weak. astonished makes it sound like something glorious. horrified is more like it.
i cannot wrap my head around the fact that half this country is supporting THAT candidate – a xenophobic, misogynistic, racist, authoritarian-praising, fascism-seeking criminal who cares not an iota about anything other than his own power. i cannot wrap my head around the fact that half this country is THAT ugly.
and what’s worse – it is because they are not thinking, they are not researching, they are not asking questions, they are not reasoning. they are merely believing what they are fed – hook, line and sinker. and they are flat-screening their ugly positions on social media, garnering likes and strokes – because they have forgotten what real community is, who real people are. the flat-screen has taken the place of real interaction, real communication, going to real places, doing real things, real life. the clique of people who would “un-friend” them in a millisecond – who are only on board the bandwagon with them for the same likes and strokes and hate-mongering – have become more important than real-live people. and they can’t see it.
were they to remember what real community is, they would be concerned with what would surely be the annihilation of women’s rights, the rights of the LGBTQ community, the rights of every non-white, the rights of humans under the constitution of the united states.
were they to remember what real community is, they would not substitute real-live people with flatland. rather, they would stand with real three-dimensional people in their three-dimensional family, in their three-dimensional friend-group, in their three-dimensional town, their three-dimensional state, their three-dimensional country.
were they to remember what real community is, they would not bury their faces in the screens and tvs that amplify that which feeds their clearly deep-seated hatred but which does not avail them of the facts, the danger, the intentions of this maga candidate. they would not abdicate their ability to seek the truth, to reason, languishing instead in the glory of maga popularity.
were they to remember what real community is, they would take to task this party which is undermining their personal communities, they would pay attention to how this destruction of democracy will actually affect their lives and the lives of those who follow after them.
were they to remember what real community is, they would choose love over hatred, forward-thinking over going backwards, together over divided. they would drag their faces out of their flat screens, away from their flat-friends, wrap their arms around the targets of this brutally unhinged candidate and tell them that they truly care about them, that we are all here to lift each other up.
but they don’t remember anymore. and they don’t think. and they clearly don’t care.
or do they?
i find that utterly terrifying.
this is a three-dimensional world with three-dimensional repercussions of your vote.
we have been really cautious through all this time – years, really – trying to be respectful of and avoid getting covid.
but here we are…in our matchy-matchy red buffalo plaid flannel pjs, suffering together.
those who have been through this already know about the fever, the headache, the incessant cough, the intense sore throat, the congestion, the tightness in your chest, the exhaustion, the aches and pains and all that. it is one hellish virus. it’s somewhat stressful for me just knowing i have this. i can’t help but remember the early days of the pandemic and the heart-breaking devastation it wrought. we have been fortunate; we haven’t ever tested positive before though we have each had some of the symptoms.
but here we are…in our matchy-matchy flannels, complaining and whining together.
a good night’s sleep seems like a really good idea – until you are laying there, coughing your silly head off all night.
dogga doesn’t seem to mind how we look or sound – and we are ever-so-grateful to be home.
but we are a bit worse for wear.
so don’t mind us as we stay put – here in our house or out on our back deck…in our red buffalo plaids, sniffling and coughing and making our way out of covidland.
this is age-old, like an aesop’s fable, like a timeworn adage, like a proverbial proverb. there are likely even petroglyphs chiseled into rocky canyon walls telling this story for all time: for the most part (and i don’t use all-encompassing language on purpose, for always there are exceptions) packing is not the same for men as it is for women.
as much as i would love to pack light, to pack smart, to pack minimally, it is apparently not in my dna strands to do so. and so i will succumb to the challenge – every time. i will wake in the night and review my list, try on my choices. i will list and cross out and list again. i will ponder and try to imagine every scenario in which i need clothing, try to anticipate every need.
it’s exhausting.
when i traveled a lot – playing concerts and shows – i was much better at packing. i have gotten out of the habit (and into a different body, let’s not forget) and so it requires much more thought, much more ruminating, perseverating even. good grief! it’s a full-time job getting ready.
i’m pretty sure it will take him about twenty minutes to pack. que sera sera.
in the meanwhile, i’ll be over here bearing, climbing and fording my burden, mountain and river. whatever.
so another week goes by. and now there are 45 days left.
45 days to discern – really think through – your vote in this election-of-elections.
45 days to determine what is most important to you…not in a singular policy kind of way…but in an overarching sense of what you would like this country to look like in the future…not only for you…but for all who follow you.
responding to our cartoon about the insanity that is the maga platform, she wrote, “they do see and they don’t care. … it’s all about hate and control … hidden within the guise of old-fashioned values and going back to the good old days.”
and it clearly doesn’t matter to them how they get there – with truth or with lies – to the nirvana of their good old days – a nirvana of patriarchal, misogynistic, racist, xenophobic, extremist, nationalistic, bigoted values (to use the word values loosely and without the virtue of meaning).
we take turns ranting. sometimes we participate in each other’s rant. sometimes we are quiet. because, frankly, sometimes it is all pretty suffocating.
if i were to rant right here, this is what i would say:
be aware of what you linger on, for there are many distractions out there, veering you off the real issues at hand. be purposeful in your research and in your discernment. be wary of what you believe, what you purport, what you amplify that you believe in. be mindful of the words you choose, for once they are in the air they are there for all time. be selfless as you consider the future of this country’s democracy. think about the words of the declaration of independence, “we hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.” linger on the words all and equal, for regardless of your race, gender, orientation, economic privilege or lack, religion, you are the same as the next person..no more, no less. remember you are in control of your vote and, as a citizen of this nation, it is incumbent upon you to vote clearheadedly and in good conscience. and, before you vote, in those moments before you take pen to paper, maybe recite these words, “epluribus unum” – out of many, one. be vigilant of who you elevate to the highest position in our this-land-is-your-land-this-land-is-my-land.
in cris’ words, “don’t relinquish your brain at the door.”
there are 45 days before you cross the threshold of the door into the room where your pen will hit the paper. bring your brain – and your heart – with you.
i’m not sure how much more my heart can handle the absolute madness of this election.
every day i think that it can’t sink any lower. yet every day it sinks lower.
every day there is more screaming bigotry, more undermining misogyny, more threatening rhetoric, more conspiracy-laced propaganda, more demonizing vitriol, more inflammatory lies, more exploitation, more distraction, more utter insanity. all with no moral compass.
it is truly beyond my comprehension why people want to support this maga candidate and a platform filled with – and unleashing – so much dangerous rage. the hatred is mind-bogglingly heart-stopping.
we get to live this life one tiny time. why is it there are millions of people who wish to do that without civility? without caring for one another? without compassion? without a thoughtful, informed investment in fact? without peace? with so much anger, division, blatant disrespect for the ideals of democracy?
and here’s the thing i now know: they can see it – the ugly. and they are choosing it anyway.
decency is on the chopping block. and it’s terrifying.
please vote with a measured and conscious heart, leading with goodness, sanity, unity, truth. this is the future of your children, your grandchildren, your family, your friends, your community, your country.
i tried to find an adjective to describe the things people are saying and doing ‘these days’. the current political climate has seemingly swung open a door to the undeniably crass, the vulgar, the rude, the shocking lie, the exaggeration, the pontificating of extremism, crudeness and base-ness beyond any description. i gave up on adjectives. because the descriptors confounding, perplexing, astonishing ….. don’t even touch it.
every single day i utter the words, “why.on.earth???!!!!” i am shocked at the things people are saying and i can’t understand why they are saying the things they are saying. i am shocked at the things people are doing and i can’t understand why – on earth – they are doing the things they are doing. so, yes, perplexed, confounded, astonished. but also stunned, disappointed, dumbfounded, bewildered, sickened.
where have manners gone? what about respect? courtesy? decorum??
you CAN feel it. there is hope in the air. there is light. there is possibility.
i – for one – am very, very, very tired of the darkness we have seen over the last decade. i am weary of the name-calling, the maga bastardizing of the honor of running for or being president, the hook-line-and-sinker of people who are in the trickle-down of mean-spiritedness, of incoherent narcissism, of a vector heading to autocracy.
i can feel the light and i am standing in it, proudly.
last saturday night i had an event that seemed in every way to be a heart event. for a half hour – in the wee hours of the night – i struggled with intense pain, wondering if there was a way that i could lessen it, wondering what to do. though i don’t necessarily feel 65, i know that i am 65 and so i was frightened.
we went to the ER to make sure this was not an emergency and, gratefully, the tests all came out fine. the mystery will be one for my personal physician and i to solve. but there is a learning – as always – here.
there is way too much darkness. in the middle of saturday night, while laying in bed thinking about life itself, i knew that the lesson presenting itself – the wisdom repeating itself – was none too small.
we have one opportunity to live this life. we can either live it ugly or live it with as much goodness as we can muster. we can greet each dawn with hope and light and generous possibility or we can perpetuate the dark of night, starless and with evil in our hearts.
i can feel it – this new hope surging through our nation. i can feel the energy, the light, a wide-open future full of wonder and blessed by simply breathing.
this trickle-down – of freedom and good intention – is contagious. the joy of the harris/walz campaign – the humanity of the harris/walz campaign – the spirit of the harris/walz campaign is washing over us.
and for that – and for sunday morning and each morning since – i am grateful.
technology – stuff – is like that. and we are surrounded by old technology and old stuff. now, don’t get me wrong. i’m not complaining. it’s just a fact. besides, i heard kamala loud and clear when she said, “don’t complain. dooo something about it!!”
and so, i do the workaround. it’s a bit like the electric shuffle, a mix-up of the hustle and the bump, maybe a little macarena-ish. it’s not a pretty mash, but it moves and shakes and gets it done.
a little over a week ago my laptop died. there is a grey folder with a question mark flashing when i turn it on. this is not good news for a macbook from 2008 – the year my girl graduated high school – and i immediately shut it down, in the hope that the next time i turn it on all will be well and it – personifying it, of course – will have forgotten its troubles and will simply get back to work.
in truth, i haven’t tried that yet.
i’m not anxious or excited about the outcome. well, to be fair, i am anxious, just not excited. i – listing heavily to optimistic – am hoping against hope that it will turn on and remember everything that would otherwise be lost. anxious. yes.
and so, in the meanwhile, i am typing on a mini ipad and trying to find creative ways to do what it is we do. so a little redundancy will have to work.
we have classic stuff.
our three vehicles (littlebabyscion, big red and my vw superbeetle) add up to 97 years old. my iphone is a 6, from the dark ages of 2016. this ipad is a mini2, only five years old but way past retiring. our tv is a non-smart late teen. it is as it is. and we totally make the best of it. not complaining, nope, nope.
i just know – in the middle of these workarounds – that there are those of you out there who get it. i wonder what it would be like to never have to figure things out, to never have to make it work, to never have to stand where you are and just be grateful and not wanting of more.
when i wash my hair today and tip the bottle, slapping the bottom of it over and over to get the last vestiges of shampoo out, i will think of my sweet momma and – apparently – kamala’s as well.
i’m thinking beaky and shyamala are visiting together on some other plane, maybe having sweet tea and, though they know we have plenty to complain about, watching us all dooo something – the best we can. and that, my dear friends, is classic.
reverse threading 